Friday, May 29, 2009

Beware~!! This is gonna be a long entry.

I've just checked my exam results at around 1pm plus and... it wasn't really satisfactory =( I did worse than last sem. Boo hoo~! Now, I've got mixed feelings and emotions. Should I 1) be happy that I've grad successfully, 2. be annoyed at myself for doing badly, 3. be angry with Jeffery coz it's all his fault for causing me so much distress during my exam period. Hm.. I wonder if it's fair to push the blame to him though coz deep down, I know that if there is any blame to be taken, both of us should share the blame =.= Haiz~ But then, I am the one who have to bear all the consequences of it.

Am just wondering.. Is there any statistics to show the correlation between results and relationships? Are people who are in a relationship more likely to perform worse in school? I think it depends on how the couples handle the relationship and their studies. Maybe I just didn't handle it well. Maybe I'm just not a good student. Maybe we should have started later.. Like after the exams. Oh well.. There are so many maybes.

Remember I said that I would do a reflection of myself as a student? Sorry, I have been procrastinating it for so long. Hm.. 16 years of study, from primary school all the way to university. That's such a long period for me to reflect upon. For primary school, I had lots of fun playing. I can only remember the carefree days of playing and going to friends' condos to swim. Sad to say, I didn't keep in contact with them except for Pei Ting. Last time, there were no email, msn nor hp, so it's difficult to keep in constant contact. I remembered that Pei Ting and I used to write to each other and meet up once in a long while. Maybe that's how we stay connected. Need to make the effort to stay in touch with each other every once in awhile. Like take the effort to sms, msn (now so convenient lor) and meet up, hang out.

For my secondary school days, it was the first time I've encountered something called S-T-R-E-S-S. In sec 2, practically everyone is chionging for the triple science class. The teachers and principal have instilled in us that it's the best class to choose, so we all just worked hard towards it. Now come to think of it, doing triple science is a pretty waste of my time considering that science has got nothing much to do with business. I would be better off taking POA seriously as it would help me in NP. Also took POA in NP lor, and I was so blur in the class. Had a hard time catching up to those who already took POA for the O levels.

After sec school, I went to study in CJC for the first 3 months thingy. Just to experience JC life. It was great, I would say. A lot of slacking. Haha~ I remember I used to hate PE coz it's bloody long lah. Forgot how long it was but it was definitely longer than sec school ones. Bleah~ I totally HATE running! Since I'm like practically reminiscing my life, I might as well include that I had my first work experience after I've decided to leave CJC for NP. But since I'm doing a reflection of my student life, I shan't go into details on my first working experience. Probably can reflect on it after I've retired. Haha~ Still got to wait long long~

Next, I've embarked on my polytechnic life. Frankly speaking, it's the best phase of my student life. Really. No longer have to wake up early in the morning everyday, can pon lecture(s) at whim (but I normally don't) and have fantastic classmates. Don't have to wear the school uniform anymore, can just go out after lessons. Ah~ Those were the days. Of course, it's also stressful in a way that it's filled with lots of projects. But I'm thankful that I have a bunch of fixed good project mates who are willing to work hard with me. Sometimes, doing projects and studying with people you like is so much better. I can still remember Yimyim and her sweets. Perk us up during lectures. Haha~ And Yimei and her lame jokes/crap. Really makes me go ('_')||| And we kept suaning and squabbling with each other. But I love it! Hee~ In NP, I've joinned BP-NP Mentoring which I totally enjoy most of the time. It was there that I've met Jiamin, etc.. And it was fun going to mentoring every week, teaching the kids, seeing my mentee(s) and going out after the session.

Lastly, it's the university life. I don't feel that involved in NUS seriously. Like I didn't really take part in any activities and there was no fixed class. So sianz~ Kept seeing new faces and yeah, have to make new friends but at the same time, hardly see those people so not very shou also. Different project mates most of the time and I don't feel close to many of them. Maybe I should get myself more involved in CCAs and the campus life. It seemed so vibrant, etc.. before I entered but when I was there, I became lazy to join those things. Also, no friend to join with me. Onyee they all are like not keen to join many things =( Then I feel so sianz to join alone. Furthermore, I got to wait until evening for those events, etc.. to start. It's so boring to wait alone. And I hardly go out after school in NUS. Go home or do projects or study. Damn sianz one. Stressful too as those schoolmates are all so smart and I always see people mugging around. Haiz~ Nonetheless, I am glad that Wen Min pulled me to attend the Startup@Singapore workshop and we've joined the competition later. It was there that I've met Xiaoyin and Clarence. Ah~ Quite fun to work with them and I do enjoy the meet-ups. And it's so cool that Xiaoyin is a law student doing her internship in a law firm. Very interesting to hear many stories.

My dear brother just got accepted a teaching career in sec school teaching Physics and Mathematics. OMG! I can't believe that he's gonna be a teacher. Last time, he used to be so impatient with me when I asked him Amath questions. So anyway, taking his advice, I've also applied to MOE in the morning. Ha~ back to my lao ben hang: teaching. Hope that they don't blacklist me coz I've rejected them once. Anyway, also not sure if I'll be accepted again coz my NUS results are worse than my NP's results. Haiz~ And now I just wonder.. How will my life be if I took up the MOE's offer last time to study in NTU-NIE? Then I would be a qualified teacher, no need to pay any school fees and don't have to look for a job now. Hm.. Life has too many what-ifs.

Okie, time to end this super long blog entry. Wah, I've got so many things to blog about. How come Eileen said that she has got nothing to blog about leh? I haven't been going out yet can still crap so many things. Haha~ But these are not crap. Everything is what I've meant. Oh yeah, I cannot send out an email using my hp. Called the Singtel person and he said got nothing wrong. Asked me to ask Samsung. WTH lor~ Like pushing responsibility.

PS: Does anyone know how to edit the line spacing? My words/lines seem so congested =(

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